"i can think of anything and everything i ever needed, right here in my dreams...."
a good response to the question “how old are you?” is something along the lines of “dunno i stopped counting after the first few centuries”
and it needs to be said seriously without smiling or humor or as casually as possible and followed by “so anyway” and a subject change as if it’s completely normal
I did this once and my friend, without missing a single beat, turns around and says “For the last time, you’re 1206. Why I even bother…”
Boyfriend: car washes are soooooo trippy
Me: fuck I wanna try that